There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
