Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
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