And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
Randomize
