the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Randomize
