My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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