So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
