guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
Maybe he injected his testicle?
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize
