Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
Randomize