The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
