So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
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