I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
