my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
Do vagina's smell?
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
Randomize
