since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
