that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
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