He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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