i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize