So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Randomize
