Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Randomize
