Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
Boobs speak an international language.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize