You're a womanizer and a bitch.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize
