I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
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