whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
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