we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
Randomize