Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
