Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Randomize
