AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Randomize
