You're so nebulous sometimes
Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
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