So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Randomize
