found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
