I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
