Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
