I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
Randomize
