Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize
