epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
