hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
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