There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
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