I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Randomize
