She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
I don't want my vagina anymore.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
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