Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
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