youre lurking in front of me
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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