can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
