I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
two words: eviction party
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
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