Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
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