I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
wakey wakey hands off snakey
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
