I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
how does that bad decision feel?
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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