One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
