I feel like I'm in dance class right now
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
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