i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
