I murdered the dance floor call the cops
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Randomize
