Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
