Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
She announced her abortion via fbk
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
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