I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
I think I just sharted jello shots
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